I have a large plastic toolbox full of Legos from when I was a kid, these are Legos from the mid to late 80s, back when the only expression the Lego men possessed was a happy, complacent smile. The majority of my Legos are either space themed legos and middle-ages themed legos, so eventually when we build together there is some sort of time travel or the merging of different time-streams which creates some sort of time-loop-paradox. Often times, the more advanced of the two wins the day if a battle takes place. It’s pretty fun to pull these out, dump them all over the floor and have some fun with my kids. This is our most recent adventure. Enjoy!
P.S. Forgive the pics…I took them with my cell phone, so some are slightly blurry.
BEHOLD! CASTLE RANDALL!! (see above)
Long ago Castle Randall stood high upon a hill, overlooking all that the Master of the castle possessed. Castle Randall was an impressive castle in its time. Every citizen took responsibility for the upkeep and defense of the Castle, even the Master himself who was a fierce warrior.
Behold the Master’s Battle Chariot and his feared battle-axe and swords!!
Behold, its tallest tower!
Therein dwells the Archer Sven “The Dead Eye Drunk”, aptly named for his amazing skill, unfortunately his skill is only revealed when he has consumed too much ale. For when he is sober, he can not hit the broadside of the Castle!
Behold the rear of the tower, note Sven’s trusty goblet, always filled to the brim with the Master’s best ale!
Behold! James & Silas the rear guards of the tower! Fierce in their duty to protect Sven and to always make sure his goblet is filled!
Other citizens of note are the two Knights: Henry and Stephen. Behold their magnificent glory! Legendary throughout the realm for their skill with a spear and shield! Their secondary weapon being their deadly short swords, attached to the saddles of their trusty steeds. Second only to these knights are the two lower archers: Bob and Pip. Bob is a lefty and Pip is a righty.
In the case of armor, weapons and such trappings of citizens soldiers wearing out, behold, the stockpile!
Behold the extra horses in the stable, awaiting their chance at battle, or their next feeding of oats!
Tis a fierce and noble way of life for these guardians of peace and tranquility. Nevertheless, they are vigilant and fly their colors proudly.
Then one day….
Sven witnesses fire coming down from the heavens with a terrible and frightful sound! If it wasn’t for the noise of this strange incident, others might’ve thought that Sven had finally gone too far in his pursuit of ale.
The following dawn, the Master, accompanied by Stephen and Henry, go out to investigate. What they find was frightful to their minds, they knew not or could they comprehend what they saw.
Men in odd garments, and oddly shaped helmets we’re moving about in some witchcraft empowered horseless chariots…NO…TWO CHARIOTS! BEHOLD!
(Obviously, by some unknown wormhole, human space explorers crash landed on earth, many, many centuries in the past. They knew not where they were…or when. The poor guys were building a shelter and communications array out of the wreckage of their transport and were lucky enough to create two transports in order to rapidly explore and determine the type of planet they were on. The castle was hidden from view as they were in a valley. As the transports came up over the ridge, they saw the castle in the distance and three lone men in ancient armor not one hundred yards away. The three communications officers tried to show that they were peaceful, but to no avail. Their visors were down and they had been having trouble loosening them after the crash. The warriors showed aggression and killed the three men. Upon retreating, one other man lost a hand!)
Upon spotting the three warriors of Castle Randall, the majority of the sorcerers attempted an attack and began to cast spells with hands stretched out and weird groanings from veiled face! Evil tidings abounded, but the warriors were not afraid. They brought swift violence upon the sorcerers! BEHOLD!
Time went by…really it was only a few days…
Long story short, the men at the Castle began to get really…REALLY sick. A bad case of diarrhea among other things. Even Sven fell victim to the sickness. After failing to communicate with anyone from their own time, the men realized where they were and approximately when by conducting recon missions under cover of darkness and by foot to the surrounding villages. Upon spying on the castle, a few men reported back that there was a sickness there, and the stench was terrible. Violating their prime directive of interfering with primitive life forms, the men set out to once again communicate with the castle dwellers and offered to help them in their time of need, a sign of peace and goodwill. The men of Castle Randall were at first against this, but multiple painful bowel movements later convinced them to allow them to receive aid. As seen in the gruesome picture above, the weird “pod” in the background is a shower that the spacemen built. Apparently, really really bad hygiene caused the sickness. Friendships were struck, the Castle was cleansed, and they became good friends. HOORAY!!!
Moral of the story: Make sure you don’t spook primitive lifeforms, Make sure to wash. Castles are cool.